Terrible Jokes Thread

[lifes2short]

way before their time

love it, completely forgotten how ridiculously funny they were, Cleese just cracks me up

 

[CatmanV2]

C

 

[midlifecrisis]

I went shopping today but...

 

[philw696]

 

[DLax69]

View attachment 110298

C

...another one for the "Differences" thread.

 

[DLax69]

 

[CatmanV2]

Probably a repeat:

important news for electric car users. I learned today that, if you break down in an electric car, you can still use the AA…
But if you break down in a small electric car, you have to use the AAA

C

 

[Scaf]

My nephew who lives in Spain still can’t say please in Spanish:

“That’s por favor “.

 

[DLax69]

Probably a repeat:

important news for electric car users. I learned today that, if you break down in an electric car, you can still use the AA…
But if you break down in a small electric car, you have to use the AAA

C

...here it's actually the AAA, regardless.



I assume all they really need when an EV owner calls is...

 

[Wattie]

https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1613070958683901952

 

[BJL]

 

[BJL]

 

[Wack61]

View attachment 110212

We had a dog that ate some peanuts, I couldn't look at a nutty bar after that

 

[philw696]

 

[Wack61]

View attachment 110385

The best one of those I saw was somebody complained about a pothole so the council sent out an engineer to explain why they didn't have to fill it in

He had a straight edge with a tape measure to show the pohole wasn't deep enough, only the pothole was that big he was measuring a pothole within a pothole, social media exploded

 

[CatmanV2]

View attachment 110385

This isn't even funny

C

 

[philw696]

This isn't even funny

C

Sorry not been over since last Summer and they weren't too bad then.

 

[lifes2short]

 

[DLax69]

The best one of those I saw was somebody complained about a pothole so the council sent out an engineer to explain why they didn't have to fill it in

He had a straight edge with a tape measure to show the pohole wasn't deep enough, only the pothole was that big he was measuring a pothole within a pothole, social media exploded

Road Workers Pave Over Dead Deer

ANDREAS, Pa. (AP) _ State transportation officials are trying to find out why workers repairing a stretch of road paved straight over a dead deer. A gooey spread of oil and rocks was left covering the deer's head, neck and shoulders along Route 895. ``The deer was lying there dead for...

apnews.com

Pennsylvania Dept of Transportation workers literally paved over a dead deer...guess this doesn't qualify for the "Differences" thread...

 

[lifes2short]

Road Workers Pave Over Dead Deer

ANDREAS, Pa. (AP) _ State transportation officials are trying to find out why workers repairing a stretch of road paved straight over a dead deer. A gooey spread of oil and rocks was left covering the deer's head, neck and shoulders along Route 895. ``The deer was lying there dead for...

apnews.com

Pennsylvania Dept of Transportation workers literally paved over a dead deer...guess this doesn't qualify for the "Differences" thread...

quote "It is against state policy to pave over a deer" do they mean that's written on some sort of policy document , thou shall not pave over dead animals